By Jodi Adrian

Anxiety

For many years, the call to evangelize the unbeliever evoked anxiety and guilt within me. It was a call that pushed me away, instead of inviting me in, and a word which felt fraught with expectation. Anxiety arose within me at it’s mention, because I believed the call on all who were followers of Jesus was to comfortably, yet boldly, proclaim the gospel to unsuspecting bystanders, wherever they might be found. Situations such as these, for a woman living in the city, occurred everyday I walked out my front door. They were ever-present, unpredictable “opportunities” which existed just outside my home, yet far from my realm of control. To consider comfortably and boldly stepping into conversations with strangers whom I knew nothing about—not their beliefs nor their perceptions—felt extremely uncomfortable, unwise, and unloving (=anxiety).

Guilt

The feelings of guilt which accompanied the anxious response to the evangelistic call, while closely associated with the expectation I assumed was firmly placed upon me, had more to do with a sense of failing at something I believed I should succeed at. I should be sharing the gospel with random strangers who walked beside me on the streets of Vancouver, yet I was not. I should be comfortable and bold in striking up conversations with those I sat next to in the local coffee shop, yet I was not. Based on the discrepancy between the assumed expectations of church leaders (and God) and my life, it was clear: I was failing at evangelism (=guilt).

Surprise

One of God’s gifts to me in marriage (and clear demonstration that God has a sense of humour) has been life with a man gifted in evangelism and faith. Being married to someone gifted differently than myself, while at times frustrating, has served to open my eyes to God’s good plan in creating humanity with different strengths and weaknesses, callings and challenges. I thank God for giving me a man who has lived as one comfortable and bold in sharing God’s Word, and his unwavering faith in Jesus. 

What began to be corrected in my understanding of evangelism through discussions with my husband, developed and matured through a course I took while studying at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. The course was aptly named, “Personal Evangelism,” and the sole reason I enrolled was owing to its status as a core requirement for my degree. I procrastinated as long as I possibly could, however, the time to register eventually came, and I determined to make it through with the best attitude I could muster. It is safe to say, next to the Hermeneutics course, I believed this would be the most daunting of my educational career. Thoughts of inauthentic, contrived evangelistic assignments flooded my mind, as I began to dive into lectures and readings. As one who greatly valued hard work and good grades, I prepared myself to not meet the expectations the professor would put before the class (=guilt + a touch of rebellion).  

However, as the professor began to introduce the syllabus and explain the assignments, I was unexpectedly hit with waves of relief and encouragement. While the aforementioned expectations for evangelism may be held by some, these were not the methods nor the audience presented in this class. The focus of this evangelism course was on sharing the truth of the gospel with those individuals whom I had already been developing relationships with. The assignments were encouragements to prepare my heart and mind to daily, intentionally, love those in my life by seeking to know them, care for them, and move toward deeper conversations where the good news could be shared. The assignments were essentially exhortations to have feet of readiness to share the gospel with those in my life. To my surprise, there were no calls to drop Bible bombs on unsuspecting individuals walking down the street. Rather, the call was to love those in my sphere of influence, by wisely looking for opportunities to share the hope I had in Jesus.

Love

It was simple, it was beautiful, and it was what I was already doing! I did love my friends, neighbours, and school moms and I deeply desired for them to know the love and sacrifice of Jesus for their sin. I had already been looking for opportunities to share the hope I had in Jesus with these people in my life, but I certainly was not as prayerful or intentional as I could have been. As love for people already in my life was further encouraged by the Scripture and teaching I was receiving, an interesting thing began to happen: the love in my heart grew, and opportunities to share the gospel became more obvious, less daunting, and more hopeful. Unexpectedly, and without conscious effort, I became increasingly comfortable, and boldly prepared to share the gospel with anyone whom I might have the opportunity to enter into conversations with—even strangers (=peace). 

The understanding of true love is found in the gospel:  “that [Jesus] laid down his life for us” (1 John 4:16a). To evangelize is to share this true love with those who have not yet received it. You and I are no different from the non-believer—we all need forgiveness, we all need grace, we all need the love of Jesus.

“For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God’s righteousness because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins. It was to show his righteousness at the present time so that he might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus” – Romans 3:22b-26
(=love).

This is the very good news we are called to share. I encourage you to prepare your heart and mind to share Jesus with those who do not yet know His love. There is a peaceful comfort which grows out of confidence in the truth that God loves His creation, is in control, and knows the hearts, perceptions and responses of those we speak to. Therefore, we can trust that He will use our humble words and deeds for His glory.

Jodi Adrian is a biblical counsellor at The Biblical Counselling Group in North Vancouver, British Columbia. She is the mother of three daughters, a son, and a daughter-in-law; and she is grandmother to two adorable little ones. Jodi works with children, youth and adults, and counts it a privilege to help individuals navigate relationships, including abuse.